EPISODE 110 | FANTASY FALLACY

Title: Fantasy Fallacy –– Trading Today’s Happiness For Tomorrow’s
Subtitle: What is the fantasy fallacy and how can it affect us on our fertility journey and after we become parents?

Description: We fall victim to the arrival fallacy when we forbid ourselves to feel happy until we accomplish that *one* thing, but oftentimes, even when the goal is achieved, we still have trouble feeling complete. In this podcast, we discuss the prevalence of fantasy fallacy in our society and methods that can help us find happiness in our present.

Takeaways

[4:47] When working toward our goals becomes sacrificial, harsh, and restricting, our achievements no longer feel rewarding.
[7:12] Something or someone external to you should not be responsible for filling that “void” inside of you.

[12:35] Many highly successful people suffer from the arrival fallacy after achieving their dreams.
[14:20] Everything you need to fulfill you is already inside yourself. Learn to be internally resourceful and not depend on anything externally.

[15:03] Arrival fallacy is the repackaging of validation. When people set goals for themselves and achieve them, they can be left with a void. When they don’t achieve their goals, they can blame their unhappiness on their failures.
[17:16] Steps to overcoming arrival/fantasy fallacy:

EPISODE 108 | LEARNING TO SAVOR THE WAIT

There is so much waiting in a fertility journey, and because we really never know how long it will take to hold that healthy baby in our arms, I think this is one of the greatest skills you can learn for the micro of the two week wait to the macro of the entirety of completing your family.  

In this episode you will learn...

- What to do when you feel in a hurry to get pregnant.

- What delay discounting is and how to know when you are doing it.

- Learn to understand which part of your brain is guiding your decision making process.

- The understanding of possiblity thinking vs probability.

- The stats on falling pregnant that are often glossed over.

When you get good at delaying gratification and disciplining yourself with healthy habits that make you feel good from a place of self love, from a place of training your brain and taking care of your body, and not because you think they will yield a baby, you can enjoy the wait of any journey in life, even falling pregnant. We call this living in high engagement with low attachment in my Conscious Conceptions program. You are engaged in living your life to its fullest, growing your capacity for uncertainty while growing your capacity to stay in prefrontal thinking and marveling at the magic that happens, which is the baby becomes the icing on the cake instead of the cake itself.

EPISODE 105 | DECISION FATIGUE & TIPS TO PREVENT IT

Decision fatigue describes how our decision-making gets worse as we make additional choices and our cognitive abilities get worn out. Decision fatigue is the reason we feel overwhelmed when we have too many choices to make, especially in the absence of resources. The phenomena of decision fatigue can affect even the most rational and intelligent individuals, as everyone can become mentally exhausted. The more decisions made throughout the day, the harder each decision becomes for us. Eventually, the brain looks for shortcuts to circumvent decision fatigue, leading to poor decision-making. While this is typically a business concept it is rampant in the fertility & parenting world because of the sheer number and weight of each decision we are asked to make on a daily basis.

Finding yourself in torturous indecision about whether you should join Conscious Conceptions? Let's clear that up together on a call.

Schedule a FREE Consult

  

EPISODE 098 | SPACE FOR GRACE

Space for grace is a personal account of where my thought work and spirituality have converged. I want to show you how to up-level your fertility journey into one of growth that will ultimately make your current suffering worth it in the end.

EPISODE 58 | MINI MINDFUL MOMENT | Moving From "I Deserve" to "I Have."

Hey there, Hilary here. Your go-to gal to help you form a plan to reclaim your fertility and create a healthy family for generations to come, all while staying sane along the way. I've got another mini-mindful moment for you today to help you combat the stress  I know you are bombarded by on your fertility journey.

Today's meditation is an excerpt from my new 30 days of fertility meditations program if you want instant access to more meditations just like this one, along with writing prompts and calming images to take your medication in to your day and to go deeper, just head over to LadyPotions.com and click the meditations tab to find the link to purchase or the tab that says, "Work with me."

I'm sure you've heard time and time again that stress negatively affects fertility and pregnancy, I'm sure that you've been told on more than one occasion to just relax and it will happen, that probably really makes you stress out maybe, even want to punch that person. Now, you can't exactly go around cutting all the stress out of your life. I mean, fertility challenges alone are stressful, your partner or your job could be your main source of stress so what are you supposed to do? Give up? Quit? Not a chance.

You make a game out of making friends with your stress response, you acknowledge it. You know what's going to happen and you get good at catching it before it becomes a freight train careening out of control, then you see how fast you can change your stress response into a relaxation response by trying on one of these little beauties from our mini-mindful moment's installments.

Meditation and mindfulness techniques and the ability to turn on our parasympathetic nervous system or what's known as "the breed and feed part" of our minds. Our evidence-based practices that not only enhance the fertility but they can also help you hold a pregnancy, even if it's high-risk.

Remember, it's not stress that's enemy, it's how fast we can get back into the relaxed state that really matters. I don't know about you, but this is not something that I was taught when I was younger. I had to go looking to find how to do this on my own and that's exactly why I've created this for you.

These mini-relaxation techniques are quick, easy to apply throughout your day and restore your relaxation response in moments. Keeping your mind broadcasting the message to your body that it's a safe time and place to create life. Helping you feel back in control of your stress and ready to conceive.

Today's meditation has to do with your ability to move from the mindset of " I deserve", which is actually a victim based mindset, into the mindset of "I have" as if it already happened. We are racing our biological clock or leading a life where we are trying to cram in everything all at once. It is very easy to push the body past as normal limits. We begin to deplete our adrenal glands in the name of achieving, forgetting that adrenaline is a precious substance to be used wisely instead of freely.

Unfortunately, the more we pump our adrenaline by overextending ourselves, chugging coffee and energy drinks, staying up too late, binging on sugar, the more addicted we become to this state. When we start to get depleted we become emotionally leaky and the recording in our head starts to whine saying, " I deserve." Instead of recognizing all that you have, pushing you to keep overextending yourself, keeping you trapped in a cycle of exhaustion and ill satisfaction.

The next time you hear yourself or your partners say, "I deserve" or "I want." Try replacing it with "We have so much." The reason for this is that like attracts like, the shift in thinking in speech will help to magnetize us into a place to receive more abundance into our lives. It will help us to create the lives we desire through a sense of gratitude rather than a sense of entitlement.

It is said that the root chakra governs our adrenaline glands and the connection with our nervous system that decides when and how much of a state of fight-or-flight we will be in, has a response to any thought, conversation or experience we have. Our second chakra covers our reproductive hormones, largely in part to the messages it receives from the root chakra.

If adrenaline is flowing our sex hormones are not. Not only does this deplete our ability to physically create healthy offspring, it also depletes our libido and our desire to connect because when adrenaline is high, it sends the message to every single cell that we are not safe. Most women need to feel safe and a desire to connect before sex even enters our minds.

 When we try to make a baby from this state, it becomes one more thing that we have to cross off our list or achieve rather than a product of desire state of union with our partner. We're in a constant mountain-climbing of achieving, the idea that a baby is never achieved and only received can seem extremely foreign and evasive. 

 We have to take the time to get calm and grounded so that we aren't accidentally hijacking our own sex hormones like estrogen, progesterone, and testosterone if we want to create a baby out of a state of union. Even if you're already doing IVF, you still want to be able to connect with your partner and enjoy it.

Today's meditation will focus on the connection between the first and second chakra, stabilizing our fight-or-flight response in order to help us regulate our reproductive hormones. Helping us to move from, "I deserve" to "I have." So, let's get started.

 Find a comfortable place to sit or lie down. If you're sitting, make sure that the spine is erect without tension. We call your alignment exercise from day one, stacking each chakra over the next from the pelvis up. Imagine that there's a string at the top of your head pulling everything into perfect, yet gentle alignment. 

Begin to observe your breath, just the gentle entering, and exiting using the part of your mind that's listening to my voice. Observe its inhaled and its exhales if you've had a particularly stressful day and you are in a place where you feel comfortable to exhale audibly, just let that go with the breath.

Maybe you can even imagine your worries or your stresses leaving on the wave of each exhale.

Gently begin to move your attention away from the breath and into the center of your head. Move your awareness all the way down to the base of the spine, the root chakra located in the center of your body between the perineum and the last vertebrae.

Maybe you can sense its deep red color.

This area is open and free of energetic debris. We feel stable and calm, provided for and safe.

Allow this chakra to begin to spin in your mind's eye or maybe just a sense of energy that you have in this area. Don't worry about which direction it spins, just imagine it's going like a gear.

As it moves, it burns off any insecurities around not having enough.

About a handbreadth above that chakra is the second chakra or our sexual chakra. Maybe, you can see or imagine its brilliant orange light, again, looking like a gear. This gear begins to spin in an opposite direction though from the root chakra below it, like interlocking watch gears feeding energetically off one another, bridging the gap between adrenaline and our reproductive hormones. When our second chakra is open and free, they are like a magnet.

Polarizing our partner to come next to us, near us, to be with us to create life. We're also a magnet of abundance, drawing in our heart's desires, the ability to form them into completion. Allow yourself to just sit for a moment with this visualization of the red and orange gear interlocking with one another, cleaning out any limiting beliefs as they spin.

 The vibration to strengthen the root chakra is lam, L-A-M, lam.

The vibration to strengthen the second chakra is vam, V-A-M, vam.

For the next five minutes, sit quietly with your awareness and attention in your lower abdomen in these two chakras. Listening to the silent repetition of lam vam, lam vam emanating from this place, strengthening your ability to remain calm in the state of stress.

Remember, the mantra is never forced. It's always gentle and when you find that you've drifted into thoughts or physical sensations, which is completely normal, just come back to listening to the silent repetition lam vam, lam vam. I'll ring a soft bell when it's time to let the mantra go.

Gently release the mantra, allow yourself to sit quietly for a moment and just observe the shift that you've made into a state of calmness, greater well-being, and heightened reproductive capability. You can say this any time, any place yourself that you need a little reminder to just stay calm, lam vam. Bye for now.

Thanks for listening to Fertile Minds Radio, hosted at www.LadyPotions.com, where you'll find past episodes, show notes, and free meditations. If you've benefited from what you've heard, leave a comment or review so it makes it easier for others to find this valuable wisdom. Let's help elevate each other. Thanks for listening.

photo credit Charles Postiaux @charlpost

@ladypotions4u on Instagram

EPISODE 47 | BACH FLOWER REMEDIES FOR THE EMOTIONS THAT COME WITH FERTILITY CHALLENGES | Erin Gray, LMT, LMHT

Bach Flower Remedies for the Emotions that Come with Fertility Challenges with Erin Gray.

Description:

Hillary’s esteemed colleague and friend Erin Gray, LCMHC, returns to dive deep into fertility challenges and the emotions that come with them. Erin has used and studied Bach Flower remedies for some time now, and she shares her experience with these super-safe homeopathic beneficial supplements. They also talk about the highlights of the 38 different remedies, the way Bach Remedies bring emotional balance into the situation, specific remedies as they play into detailed emotions, and Erin’s recommendation for bringing them into your life.

 

Takeaways:

[2:10] Bach Flower Remedies work on specific issues, and are unique in the way that they can support emotional balance. This makes them great for most cases of someone going through IVF.

[3:27] Every medical system has its own way of categorizing supplements. In traditional Chinese medicine, we have the Eight Pillars or the Five Elements. Ayurvedic medicine has it’s Dosha’s and the Bach Flowers have their own two categories. One is by the personality type and ongoing characteristics and the other is a certain mood that relates to the moment and the fleeting marker of the experience.

[4:40] There are 38 different tinctured remedies, categorized into 7 different families. They have a subtle taste and usually go in water or under the tongue.

[8:12] Rescue Remedy won’t take away your personality or fix a life situation but it will help to bring a sense of balance and coping into the situation.

[9:21] One of the biggest things Erin sees when working with fertility clients is fear and anxiety. When you have general anxiety or anxiety of an unknown, she suggests using Aspen. If you experiencing a specific fear and are clear about what it’s about, Mimulus is a good one. If you are overly worried about a loved one, Red Chestnut can come to the rescue.

[11:45] Beech can help us open up our minds, and bring in more patience and peace. Rock Water is useful to go easier on yourself and is one of Erin’s most used remedies. The overly controlling personality type could benefit from Vine. When you are having trouble making decisions or confused about your own judgment, go with Cerato. If you are faced with multiple choices and not sure which one you want to choose, Scleranthus can help you figure out which path to go down. Gorse is also a big one for women in the IVF process, as it can help to connect with the true intention, and in turn, restore a sense of hope.

[16:06] Although the remedies are gentle, if not used properly they can neutralize and do nothing or do the complete opposite and cause the emotion to appear even stronger.

[21:03] Of all the Bach Remedies, the one recommended for difficulty in life transition and conceiving is Walnut. Impatiens is a good one to help manage impatience, loneliness, and frustration. This can be very beneficial during the waiting time in IVF and can be cycled in and out to be taken when you are in the throes of the intense emotions.

[26:03] If you find yourself struggling with being present, or in a dissociative state, Clematis is very helpful in getting grounded and back into reality. Honeysuckle is a good one for past regrets, living too much in the past or a sense of nostalgia that interferes with your present moment. White Chestnut can help in getting your mind to settle down and relax, rather than replaying situations over and over and trying to predict every move in the future.

[29:21] Pine is a good one for forgiveness, and letting go of any guilt or shame you may be holding on for yourself. Star of Bethlehem is a beautiful remedy to help with grief, loss, and trauma and Crab Apple can help shift from body shame or a sense of betrayal in your body into a sense of acceptance and peace.

[33:19] If you can’t forgive someone else, and hold resentment and anger towards them, try bringing in some Willow. When you have a burning hatred (think Mean Girl), feel jealousy and mistrust, use Holly.

[35:29] You can look up Bach practitioners in your area that can do assessments and custom blends for you. Oftentimes people need more than one remedy, but just be sure not to mix them all at once.

EPISODE 44 | MINI MINDFUL MOMENT | Have You Been "Noceboed" ?

How to Recognize and Reverse a Nocebo

Most of us are familiar with a placebo, however, do you know what a nocebo is? A nocebo is a detrimental effect on health produced by psychological or psychosomatic factors such as negative expectations of treatment or prognosis by a health care provider. It happens in the fertility and birth worlds more than you think. Today we will go into detail of signs that it is happening, how to be more aware in the moment during healthcare appointments, and how to undo it if it has happened to you. Cheers to happy beliefs, less stress, and being one breath closer to that baby you are dreaming of! 

[12:39] Visualization Begins

Links Mentioned

Pregnancy Brain

It’s Conceivable

The Three Keys to Conception

http://www.hypnofertility.com/

Parents On Demand Network

We are super excited to now be a part of the POD network, available in any app store for free. You’ll find Fertile Minds Radio as well as other qualified podcasts guaranteed to help you on the road to parenting success.

EPISODE 42 | MINI MINDFUL MOMENT | 16 Seconds to Bliss

Mini Mindful Moments

16 Seconds to Bliss

This relaxation response technique is so easy you might forget how to do it.

This episode is brought to you by the online course- How to thrive with Your Newborn presented by the talented doula Adriana Lozada

Getting pregnant can be difficult, staying pregnant can be day to day for some, and bringing your baby home and getting to know what YOUR baby needs can be super trying, but  it doesn’t have to be. If you want to feel confident about your postpartum experience this course is definitely for you and it is super affordable. With over a decade of experience, Adriana teaches you how to understand the baby you were blessed with in a 5 week self paced online experience. You can find it at birthfulcourses.com or in today’s show notes. 

EPISODE 40 | HOW TO USE MALAS AND CRYSTALS AS PART OF YOUR FERTILITY MEDITATIONS

How to Use Malas and Crystals as Part of Your Fertility Meditations

 

Today's mini mindful moment answers the questions...

Why would someone use a crystal?

What is a mala?

How to do japa meditation?

How do you infuse an intention into a stone or piece of jewelry? 

How would this possibly help my fertility?

Visit @ Rejuled on IG and use the code FERTILE18 to claim your 20% discount on one of these mala bracelets. 

EPISODE 38 | MINI MINDFUL MOMENT | Verbal Suggestions So You Can Calm the Frick Down

Todays relaxation response technique is technically called Autogenic Training. It’s a technique that is credited to Dr. Johannes Schultz and was popularized in the 90’s by Dr. Herbert Benson’s book - The Relaxation Response and has to do with the power of verbal suggestion. Now these verbal suggestions called orientations, can be thought of as a type of self hypnosis. This is different than an affirmation because we are going to take the verbal suggestions into the body to help it relax, not just repeat something in our minds. Once you’ve used this phrase though and effectively calmed your body down, you should be able to pull it out in a pinch and repeat it silently to yourself and have some of the same effect. It's perfect to use when your heart is racing before a doctors appointment or during the two week wait when you find yourself extra anxious. When you use autogenic training, you are essentially bypassing your conscious mind in order to instruct your body to relax via your subconscious mind. Autogenic Training sounds so formal and stuffy though- so I decided to rename it today to verbal suggestions so you can calm the frick down.

Today's episode is brought to you by, Pregnancy Brain, by Parijat Deshpande. You can find it anywhere books are sold or at pregnancybrainbook.com.

EPISODE 33 | MINDFUL PARENTING IN A MESSY WORLD w/ Michelle Gale

Mindful Parenting in a Messy World with Michelle Gale

Description: Today we are joined by Michelle Gale, bestselling author, speaker, strategic advisor and mother/member of her lovely Family Council. Michelle and I talk about mindfulness as the number one secret to parenting with a clear head and open heart. She shares the intention and inspiration behind her book, Mindful Parenting in a Messy World,her own transformation from anxiety and fear to acceptance and empowerment, how new parents may find time to weave mindfulness and meditation into their jam-packed schedule, and how she herself practices mindfulness in her own family.

To share your own fertility story, please email me at hillary@ladypotions.com. I look forward to connecting with you, as you are what this podcast is all about.

 

Takeaway:

[:42] The Free 29 Day Fertility Challenge is just around the corner, starting August 26! Each day you will get an email from me reminding you to log in and check out the new meditation. Each meditation will guide you through your chakras, helping you to free stuck emotions, release limiting beliefs and to tone your physical body, reading it for conception.

[1:45] Meditation is truly the secret weapon when it comes to parenting with a clear head and open heart. Many parents become so busy that they forget the very practice that is there to help them stay grounded, peaceful and sane during the time right after childbirth when they would need it most.

[2:17] Our guest today is Michelle Gale. Michelle was previously the head of Learning and Leadership Development at Twitter, has a bestselling book titled Mindful Parenting in a Messy World: Living with Presence and Parenting with Purpose, and a podcast, Mindful Parenting in a Messy World. In addition to her board work with Holistic Life Foundation, she is currently a strategic advisor to the Mindful Schools and the Wisdom 2.0 Conference.

[5:45] Michelle makes it a priority for herself to weave mindfulness in throughout the day. She shares the different ways we can practice it, whether it’s taking a moment to make eye contact a few seconds longer with our children, meditating in the morning or evening, or using a meditation app for even 5 minutes a day. You can check out Michelle’s 7 Day Series on the app Simple Habit.

[8:53] In knowing ourselves, we create the conditions for peace in ourselves and our communities. If we want a generation that is awake, we need to awaken ourselves first.

[11:08] Michelle revealed in her book that so much of her anxiety as a parent came from a fear of screwing up. She reached a turning point when she realized she wanted to focus on the magic that was her actual kids, instead of the story about them and about how things should be, that she was seeing through a “should” filter.

[14:44] Moments where we overreact and make mistakes as parents become an opportunity for growth, and serve as a teaching moment for ourselves and our children on the importance of handling stress and taking care of ourselves.

[20:02] Michelle shares the experience of enlisting her son Tyler as her teacher to help notice patterns of reactivity and then remind her to breathe.

[24:14] I read an amazing excerpt from Michelle’s book on her take on teenage behavior, unmet needs, and the evolutionary response to separate in adulthood.

[28:25] Meditation may be the formal practice, and mindfulness can be done everywhere at any time.

[31:18] Michelle teaches Mindful Listening to her family and recommends starting out a Family Council in small bits at a time, so everyone practices getting a chance to both listen and speak. Her own Council has evolved over time and is something that has helped strengthen the family and make each member feel seen and heard.

[35:26] Michelle’s first Online Summit has a star-studded, wonderful cast of people talking about all aspects of parenting. For more information, join her online community.

 

References:

Fertile Minds on LibSyn

Fertile Minds on iTunes

Mindful Parenting in a Messy World: Living with Presence and Parenting with Purpose, by Michelle Gale

Mindful Parenting in a Messy World

Simple Habit 7 Day Series

The Way of Council, by Jack Zimmerman in collaboration with Virginia Coyle

Happily Family 

Michelle Gale

Mindfulness in America 

 

Continue Your Journey:

Link to sign up for free 29-day meditation challenge

@ladypotions4u on Twitter

@ladypotions4u on Instagram

My Website: Ladypotions.com

Disclaimer * 

You must not rely on the information in this podcast as an alternative to medical advice from your doctor or other professional healthcare provider. If you have any specific questions about any medical matter you should consult your doctor or other professional healthcare provider. If you think you may be suffering from any medical condition you should seek immediate medical attention. You should never delay seeking medical advice, disregard medical advice, or discontinue medical treatment because of information on this website or in this podcast.


EPISODE 32 | MINI MINDFUL MOMENT | Ocean Breath

Mini Mindful Moments- Fertility Exercises For Every Day Use

Meditation is great, but what happens when you need to reset your nervous system during the day from Fight & Flight to Breed & Feed? Mini Mindful Moments are techniques for you to try out throughout your day to help you not only be more mindful and present, they will affect your nervous, immune, and endocrine systems biochemically in a positive way when practiced regularly. Enjoy! 

I suggest setting an alarm on your phone during your work day or after what you anticipate to be stressful events to help you get in the habit of creating a calmer you! Try it and see for yourself and remember what calm, cool, and confident you feels like. 



EPISODE 24 | MINDFUL MOMENTS | Guided Visualization for Relaxation

Today’s Mindful Moment session invites you to float away from the everyday stresses and move towards what makes you feel good. Our guided meditation doesn’t use a mantra or breath, just our imagination to teleport you to a place that we associate with comfort and relaxation. This is perfect for yourself and possibly your partner as well, and a great way to start your morning practice or before going to a doctor’s appointment.

To share your own fertility story, please email me at hillary@ladypotions.com. I look forward to connecting with you, as you are what this podcast is all about.

Takeaway:

[0:33] Today’s episode is brought to you by my 29-Day Meditation Challenge, starting April 29, 2018.

[1:17] Managing and lowering stress is extremely important in everyday life, especially in cases of fertility and conception. For example, a study in 1993 by Domar pointed out that distress scores of depression and anxiety were similar to those engaged in cancer treatment and MORE than those recovering from a heart attack.

[2:15] I suggest the images rather than give them to you because what we all find relaxing is subjective and it is up to you to feel in control and calm. The more you practice this guided meditation, the more you access this during stressful or trying times.

[4:14] The guided relaxation begins. Please find a comfortable place to lie down or sit where you are away from distractions.

[16:43] Guided relaxation comes to an end. Know that this is an exercise you can come back to time and time again when you need some relaxation and clarity in your life.

EPISODE 22 | MINDFUL MOMENTS- Quiet Continuous Breathing

Today’s mindful moments episode is all about setting your morning right with a quiet continuous breathing meditation. Whether you have 30 seconds or 30 minutes a morning, this will help get you clued into your own body every morning, and set you throughout your day with more positive self-talk and intention. I recommend this meditation both before and after you take your basal body temperature. Nothing fancy, just quiet continuous breathing and some visualization to start your day out with a connection to yourself and your calmest potential. To share your own fertility story, please email me at hillary@ladypotions.com. I look forward to connecting with you, as you are what this podcast is all about.

TIP: Do this BEFORE you take your BBT in the morning for optimal mindset throughout your day

Takeaway:

[1:11] Today's Mindful Moments Meditation focuses on the quiet and continuous breath.

[2:31] Watching bad news early in the day had long-lasting effects and set the tone for a negative day. Shawn Achor and his wife Michelle Gielan, as originally reported in Harvard Business Review, found when you’re exposed to just three minutes of negative news first thing in the morning, you have a 27 percent higher likelihood of reporting that you had a bad day six to eight hours later, compared to a group exposed to positive, solutions-focused news.

[4:18] If you like these meditations and want to sign up for my free 29-day meditation challenge I’ll be offering in April, go to the show notes click here and click the link to sign up so you’ll know as soon as it is live. If you are listening to this past April 2018 you can still click the link and you'll be able to purchase the challenge to do on your own.

[6:09] The key is to pay attention and observe the breath. This meditation does 4 x 4 breaths, with observing on the inhale and exhale. This is a technique that I just practiced with my teacher davidji and I absolutely love. I have a hard time following my breath, but this practice had me in a trance in a matter of minutes.

[9:02] It is recommended to do this meditation, take your basal body temperature and then practice the meditation again. Even as little as 5 minutes can be key to setting the tone for the day.

[10:45] You will hear a bell at the 5, 10, 15 and 20-minute mark. This will remind us to gently move our focus back on the breath.

[11:21] Meditation begins and offers a sweet spot of quiet and quickness.

[35:59] Meditation ends and we focus on our physical surroundings and the peacefulness we cultivated.

LINKS MENTIONED:

Link to sign up for free 29-day meditation challenge

Manifest Your Dream Life Retreat with davidji -affiliate link- coupon code for $150 discount- dreamlife2018 

@ladypotions4u on Twitter

@ladypotions4u on Instagram

Special Thanks to Christopher Lloyd Clarke for music

EPISODE 11 | EMPOWERED BIRTH PT 1 | Labor Positions, Stages & Breath w/ Dawn Herring

Labor Positions, Stages of Labor, and Breathing During Birth with Dawn Herring of the Empowered Birth Series Pt. 1

 

Description:

Today I welcome special guest Dawn Herring, wife and mama of two beautiful babies and Happy Birth Way (HBW) Certified Childbirth Educator. Dawn shares with us how she became a childbirth educator and what inspires her to educate couples on evidence to have the most empowered birth experience possible. We cover three very important lessons that Dawn teaches in her class recording breath and movement, the stages and phases of labor, support techniques, the role of mindfulness, intuition and movement, and some practical tips to be armed with information throughout their journey.

Takeaways

We welcome to the show our special guest, Dawn Herring.

[4:45] Dawn knew when she was pregnant with her first baby and sitting in her HBW (Happy Birth Way) birth education class — and marketing the training — that she wanted to teach. She herself had some healing to do — both of her births were beautiful water births but ended in transfers to the hospital due to complications from a retained placenta. It took her taking her own training to really begin to heal from the self-judgment, doubt, and disappointment that she was carrying with her because things didn’t go quite as planned.

[5:40] Giving women and their partners the education AND open space to have a conversation of compassion, empathy, and understanding is her catalyst and passion.

[10:20] Radical self-acceptance and love is the place to start in the process of an empowered birth. Accept and forgive knowing you did the best you could, and practice mindfulness with being present with your loved ones.

[12:08] Dawn shares what an empowered birth and labor experience looks like. Knowledge is power and the more meaningful dialogue a mom has prior to the labor the more set up they are and the easier to navigate through the process, should things change.

[17:04] The ability to connect with our babies early on in pregnancy helps to foster a sense of trust in the process and to surrender to the perfection in what’s happening.

[18:47] Her first class is “Breath and Movement.” We kick off our series by understanding how important breath and movement are during labor. Breath during labor is so important because how we breathe is directly correlate to how our nervous system and hormonal system respond in labor. Using the breath to cope during labor helps to keep our minds “right” and our body to do what it needs to do to keep labor progressing. 

[25:43] The second class is “The Letting Go of Labor – Stages and Phases and Labor Support Techniques.” 

This includes how knowing what’s happening in your body during labor, and what your baby is doing, is key to setting yourself up for an empowered experience. In this class, the focus is on what’s happening during Stage

1 labor — early, active and transition. In this class, Moms will learn how to use movement to bring awareness to what you and your baby need during labor. This also empowers labor partners to give practical tips on how to help the mom.

[35:02] Attending birth classes is a very important part of men being empowered, because this is new to them, too. Giving them as much info as possible can help set them up and make them feel comfortable with what lies ahead.

[40:22] “Learning Labor Positions.” The third class is practicing some labor positions in an environment that simulates the intensity of a contraction that can help moms and dads practice their breath along with movement and get some of the “awkwardness” out so that they can remember it when the time comes.

[49:40] For any of Dawn’s students where interventions became part of the equation, they have ALL said that they felt in charge of those choices, informed, empowered and less scared about them. We can also tell you that where you labor makes a huge difference vs. birth center, home, etc.

[56:57] We don’t want to be in fear or defensive, and the more we can dialogue — the earlier possible — the better. It’s a good idea to get everyone involved with the birth on board before the actual labor begins.

[66:30] We give information on Dawn’s classes and how you can take them if you are currently in the Tampa area. 

Links to take you further

To Reach out to Dawn for private sessions

empoweredbirthseries@gmail.com

Link to register for Dec 7th Class - if  you don't have a mindbody account, it will take a brief minute to create one. 

http://bit.ly/2y384df

Links on induction - I will preface this with that these are for women who enjoy reading statistics and lots of detailed info. I find them fascinating but also get taken out sometimes with all the dates, etc.  But for the most part, Evidence Based Birth does a great job of compiling data and getting to a bottom line:

https://evidencebasedbirth.com/friedmans-curve-and-failure-to-progress-a-leading-cause-of-unplanned-c-sections/

https://evidencebasedbirth.com/evidence-on-inducing-labor-for-going-past-your-due-date/

Maternal Age:

https://evidencebasedbirth.com/advanced-maternal-age/

EPISODE 4 | DOING VS BEING | Erin Gray, LCMHC

I had the pleasure of working with today’s guest, Erin Gray, in a previous practice and fell in love with her unique style and impressive skill set. She can unravel problems and focus on the root of the issue by working with the patient in partnership with their energetic and emotional body. She helps women everywhere gain clarity and insight along their process towards wellness. Today’s episode is all about doing vs. being and the false notions that we are lazy or passive when we receive. Our generation has been raised to be goal-oriented and to go after what we want, whether it’s a law degree or a new car. While being independent is great and what the culture values, infertility is way different and it’s important to value receiving to get pregnant and stay pregnant. There's power in learning how to lean into doing things for the purpose of feeling good rather than to achieve a specific result. Finally, Erin and I give some tips for self-care that hopefully will provide listeners with a feeling of hope, relaxation, and gratitude.

“You have a right to perform your prescribed duties, but you are not entitled to the fruits of your actions. Never consider yourself to be the cause of the results of your activities, nor be attached to inaction.”

— BHAGAVAD GITA CHAPTER 2 VERSE 47

“We are talking about divine timing. That is absolutely not the same thing as setting and achieving a goal.”

— ERIN GRAY

Takeaways:

[7:15] Today’s episode is specifically on doing vs. being. Doing is masculine, directive, and action-oriented. Being is subtle and feminine and receptive.

[10:54] Learning how to receive can be uncomfortable and a foreign experience. You are not alone and many women wonder what’s wrong with them or what else they can do.

[17:42] It is normal to feel frustrated or sad when what you are hoping for doesn’t happen right away. Many times it’s between 3-5 months before the feeling kicks in for most women who are trying to conceive.

[21:23] We introduce the pleasure principle of women learning how to have joy and kindness to themselves and to listen to what their body is telling them.

[24:42] Some self-care activities that are free (mostly) include: reading a nice book, journaling, taking a relaxing bath, and meditating.

[29:45] Learning to be alone is one of the most important gifts you can give yourself and the loved ones around you.

 

Continue Your Journey:

Erin Gray

Pussy: A Reclamatio

“Your willingness dictates the pace. Instead of just giving you the answers, a great healer helps you find yourself.”

— HILLARY TALBOTT

About Erin:

Erin M. Gray is a Licensed Mental Health Counselor and a Licensed Massage Therapist. She graduated from Nova Southeastern University with a Master’s degree in Mental Health Counseling and from Bhakti Academe School of Intuitive Massage and Healing with a diploma and certifications in Level V Bhakti Massage and Bhakti Energy Work. She is also certified as a Level I Aromatherapy Practitioner.