[:57] Anger is a powerful emotion and one that can cause great harm or tremendous growth. It's completely up to us how we choose to use it in our lives. And I say use it because it can create great movement in our lives and a fertility journey. Finally letting ourselves off the hook for something we did when we were 20, forgiving our partner if they have some sort of block to having a child whether that’s mental or physical, or forgiving ourselves for something we did or said, especially if when hormonally hijacked on something like Clomid can be key to opening up space within ourselves.
[1:15] Remaining angry with someone is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die. Imagine what it does when the person you are angry with is you! Refusing to acknowledge our anger with ourselves or someone else can cause great harm on all three levels — physically, emotionally, and mentally. From a TCM perspective, we actually diagnose a type of depression that is the result of anger and frustration being turned inwards and pushed down until it eventually eats up all of a person's joy and turns into a smoldering depression. Sometimes I see this as a major cause of unexplained infertility.
[2:23] So what is the solution? First, identify what you are actually angry about, who you are angry at, and what part you played in the situation. After we identify it, we accept it as something that happened in the past or a past version of ourselves if we are to blame and then we commit to continue to release it as many times as it takes until we reach a state of complete forgiveness for everyone involved. This takes great patience and commitment but it’s the greatest gift we can give ourselves.
[3:20] Forgiveness is never for the other person. It's always for ourselves. It's letting go of something that is causing us great pain and it takes incredible strength and repetition to continue to forgiveness. One must not confuse this with weakness or with letting the other person or ourselves off of the hook.
[3:58] When you find you are having trouble forgiving, remember we are all human. And just as you’re not the culmination of one thing or one action or mistake, neither is someone else.
[4:04] In today's meditation we will be quietly asking ourselves some questions so we can zero in on where we carry the anger or frustration in our body and we will use a mantra to help release the bodily feeling or the obsessive thoughts that sometimes occur with anger. According to Ram Das in Buddhism mantra means “mind protecting.” A mantra protects the mind by preventing it from going into its usual mechanical habits, which often are not our optimal conscious perspective.
[4:50] Mantras can be super helpful when we are feeling consumed by a feeling or replaying someone's word or a situation in our head. Not only can you use this as the mantra during sitting meditation, but you can use it in your waking day when you become aware that your thoughts have drifted back into replay mode. When you become aware this is happening, simply repeat the mantra to yourself several times until you feel some space or peace open up inside of you.
[5:54] Today we will be using a mantra heralding the archetype of the Green Tara. In the Mahayana Buddhist tradition, it is believed that she is a Bodhisatta, or a Buddha, who has chosen to stay accessible to humans to help relieve their suffering. She is said to awaken our wisdom so we see the truth of our reality and to heighten the compassion of the person repeating her mantra or focusing on her figure.
[6:22] Buddhists say her qualities are accessible to anyone regardless of religion or creed, so fear not if aren't Buddhist, it can still be a strong practice. However, If you have a strong Christian background and this makes you uncomfortable I wish to stress that this isn't worshiping false Gods, rather it is asking to have the same qualities the figure was known to embody.
[7:27] The Sanskrit mantra we will be using is a bit of tongue twister, "Om Tare Tu Tare Ture Swaha" but that's okay because it will act as a magnet of concentration. Sanskrit mantras are interesting because they are based on seed syllables or Bija mantras, that set up vibrations fields though sound. They work even when recited silently, reverberating within.
[7:49] Meditation begins.
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[23:28] Anytime in your waking day if you sense anger, or frustration, silently to yourself use the mantra to help release it as you remember your commitment to forgive for the sake of yourself.
[24:01] POEM from Prayers of Honoring, by Pixie Lighthorse.
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